25 April 2008

Expedite my inheritance, please.

I have a Yahoo e-mail account only because I have had it for several years. Nowadays, I get spam in the inbox, which is annoying. That could explain my extreme disappointment with the recent spam messages in my Gmail inbox (see last post). I feel like I'm running from an approaching tide, but it is encroaching at my toes and there's nothing I can do to stop it.

Wow.

But there was one e-mail in particular that caught my eye as I was filtering through the unsolicited spam today. I have bolded the items that made me laugh in particular. Where, oh where did it come from? And how did it get to my inbox?

The mysterious author spelled "withdrawal" and "until" wrong, and there are a couple of capitalization errors, but you know, other than that, it seems kind of official.

CENTRAL BANK OF NIGERIA
OFFICE OF THE GOVERNOR
CORPORATE HEAD QUARTERS.
MAITAMA, ABUJA.
OUR REF: CBN/IRD/CBX/021/08

RE: IMMEDIATE PAYMENT NOTIFICATION

Attn: Beneficiary

This is to draw your attention that your fund ($7.690million) lying in suspense account with the CENTRAL
BANK OF NIGERIA. The presidency Federal Government of Nigerian has authorized us to verify effect
every outstanding payment immediately based on the Government instruction by the President Alhaji Musa
Yar'Adua, the only problem now is that we dictated a lot of irregularities associated with your transfer and
we will appreciate it if you answer the following question.

(1) Did you at any time delegate any body not even from your family to claim your fund on your behalf?

(2) Were you involved in a motor accident?

(3) Are you aware or related to one Mr. Thomas Mick from your country?

Please reconfirm and answer the above questions because Mr. Thomas Mick came to our foreign payment
department and submitted an application that you authorized your fund to be paid into the account of Union
Bank of Switzerland (UBS) with Account number UBS-A943BDG99 with a report that you are now paralyzed
as a result of the ghastly motor accident you had some months back.

After processing the application of Mr Thomas Mick himself which he made known to us that he came from
you, he succeeded in getting some required documents as to make sure that we effect this transfer as
quickly as possible without any further delay.

The delay in transferring the funds is due to the request for a power of attorney authorizing him to pursue
this payment on your behalf. He asked for a week so as to submit the document, but up till now we have
not received any of the documents from any of you. Why? please forward us the power of attorney by a
return E-mail: so that we can ask Union Bank of Switzerland (UBS) to effect your payment to his nominated
Bank account on your behalf without delay. Reply to my personal email address
chukwumacharless1@gmail.com otherwise let me have your number to call you and do not fail to reply to
the email address stated above or call me on my direct number +234-805-6064158.

Based on this issue the fund will be paid to you via swift transfer to your account or ATM DEBIT CARD
which will be sent to your home address and you will be instructed on your daily withdrawls of
$30,000.00usd per day untill the sum is completed.

Anticipating your prompt response.

Best Regards.
Prof. Charles C. Soludo.
Executive Governor, Central Bank of Nigeria (CBN).

1 comment:

Karen in Wichita said...

I got the spellchecked version. Or something.

The "withdrawls" became simply "withdraw," and "my" bank account number was "USS" instead of "UBS" (but otherwise the same, which is what I Googled to get to your entry). But the best part was that all of the "power of attorney" phrases had been changed to...

wait for it...

"power of Anthony."

Also, mine was only 7.4M. Declining dollar, I guess.

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